After my last appointment at the OB, I learned that I would have to make a decision about whether or not to be induced soon, and have to decide before Valentine's day. I'm a bit torn in making this decision, even though I was induced with my other two children and honestly, both of them were good experiences. The first time I was pregnant, I wasn't sure exactly how I wanted things to go. I considered attempting natural, but wanted the option of having pain relief if it got too bad. I figured I would just go into labor, then decide what to do as things progressed. Of course, as I got farther along in pregnancy, the idea of having an all-natural birth sounded horrible with as awful as I was feeling, and the idea of an epidural sounded lovely.
When I was pregnant with Madelynn, I started having pre-term labor. At 28 weeks, it was discovered that I was already over 50% effaced and was having contractions that eventually brought it to nearly 75%.... or something like that. That was over 6 years ago- I can't remember the exact numbers, but basically it was quite concerning. I was put on modified bedrest and couldn't go to work for 3 months, and also put on medication to stop the contractions. Fortunately, where I worked had a sick leave bank that I qualified for and was able to continue getting benefits and pay during this time. My doctor was absolutely positive that she would be born a few weeks early, and was just trying to get me to 36 weeks before delivering. And then my body decided "just kidding, I'm not going to go into labor on my own." Given the issues I had during that pregnancy, my doctor was nervous about letting me go past my due date, so I was induced on my due date. By that point, I was already 100% effaced and 2-3 cm dilated with regular contractions, so it really wasn't a big deal. Every single mother I had talked to about induction told me it was absolutely horrible and to avoid it if it at all possible. But it wasn't bad at all- I had been having regular contractions for so long, that the increased ones from the Pitocin didn't even hurt, I would just have to stop walking around to catch my breath when a bigger one would come on. It is also worth mentioning that this particular winter was one with absolutely horrible snow and ice storms that shut school down for over a week, and the day she was born was the only day that the roads were in decent shape, so we didn't have to chain up the car and drive down from the top of the hill we lived on. Anyway, basically the entire birth was fine, other than my epidural being TOO effective, requiring forceps because she refused to come out. Recovery was pretty harsh, but the experience in the hospital was delightful.
When I was pregnant with Ian, I was monitored closely to watch for signs of pre-term labor. I had a bit of a scare at about 26 weeks when I started randomly bleeding and contracting, but no cause was ever discovered, and I was just put on modified activity for a couple of months to be safe, but I never had the problems I had with my first pregnancy. At this same time, my dad was dying of cancer. I knew it was likely that he would never meet his grandson, but hoped that he might miraculously live just long enough to see him. My dad and I spent a lot of time wearing our matching sea-bands to help with the nausea, and I found it ironic that we were both feeling horrible, but knew that the end results would be completely opposite. It's definitely easier to deal with feeling horrible when you know that it will eventually get better and the results would be with it, as opposed to knowing it would just get worse and lead to a terrible outcome. As my due date approached and my dad just got worse and worse, I knew that time was of the essence. There was no medical reason for me to be induced with Ian, but I told my doctor that I insisted on being induced if Ian still wasn't here 5 days after his due date, which is when I ended up having him. I was already 4 cm dilated when I went in, and so getting to the point of active labor wasn't terribly difficult. Ian was born after only a few hours of being in the hospital- I couldn't believe how fast he came! 10 minutes of pushing and BAM, hello world. It was pretty awesome, and then I was immediately put on anti-depressants, because HELLO, given that I had severe post-partum anxiety with Madelynn and didn't even know if I would make it out of the hospital before my dad died, it was clearly necessary. For the record, I healed remarkably quickly with him and was able to leave the hospital the very next day. My dad ended up dying just hours after we put Ian in his arms, and I absolutely do not regret the decision to be induced. I knew he was holding on just so he could meet him, and every day that I remained pregnant was one more day of him being in excruciating pain.
So this time, I have absolutely no medical reason to be induced and no one on the verge of death (because the person that traded places with this baby died at the beginning of this pregnancy- I can only have babies if someone in my family dies. Seriously.) The kicker with this? My OB is going to be out of town a few days before my due date and the next week after. He won't let me go past 41 weeks (and I won't let me go past 41 weeks, given how Ian was already a bit "overcooked" so to speak with only 5 days past his due date, so we're in agreement.) Which leaves me with two options- wait for my body to go into labor naturally, knowing that there's a strong possibility of waiting longer than I am comfortable with to have the baby and having a complete stranger deliver him, or be induced a week before my due date. I'm already dilated to 4 and having quite a few contractions, so inducing labor wouldn't be a problem, but I've never been induced before I was due. Yes, I know it seems that being at 4 and having lots of contractions would mean I would be having this baby within the next week, but alas, my last two babies were the same way, so I just got to spend multiple weeks having contractions all the time and slowly dilating. To be honest, I will probably end up electing to be induced valentine's day weekend. Why? For one, we don't have much of a support system here. If we were back in Eugene, there's a zillion people I could call to help. We know of a couple people here we can call to help watch the kids, but it's not a guarantee that we will be able to get a hold of them at the drop of a hat- especially if I go into labor at 3 in the morning. Which would mean we would potentially have to drag the kids to the hospital and traumatize them. They've spent enough time in hospitals being traumatized; especially Madelynn. Also, it would be nice to have at least one familiar medical professional at the birth. I am also feeling pretty awful now- two bouts of viruses with only 3 days respite in between has worn me down, the pelvic pain is relentless, the reflux is constant whether I'm standing up or lying down, and now I'm getting shooting pains down the front of my right thigh, so the idea of having one less week of being pregnant sounds pretty sweet. I also miss being able to breathe comfortably through my nose. Neither onption is ideal, but we just don't have as many options here. Well, either way, I think I will start eating lots of fresh pineapple and Indian food. If it doesn't do anything to help things along, at least it's delicious. On a final note, I know that everyone has strong opinions one way or the other about the "right", and if you give yours telling me what to do, I will probably be annoyed and ignore it. I just want this baby to get here safely, whether he falls out on his own or requires assistance. Whether or not you had your baby in a magical waterfall surrounded by fairies or had a c-section, I don't have strong opinions either way and just hope that you didn't have a terrible experience.
Sunday, February 1, 2015
Saturday, January 24, 2015
When the kids are in bed, you eat chocolate pudding and write a blog post.
With the arrival of baby #3 getting closer, I haven't felt like doing
much of anything. If you actually look forward to reading either of my
blogs, I apologize that they will be few and far between for the next
while. If you hate my writing, then you probably aren't reading this
anyway.
My due date is exactly 4 weeks from today- Feb 21. I'm feeling relatively good, considering that I'm over 8 months pregnant. Eating pretty much whatever I feel like, mostly because I have horrendous acid reflux that is ever present and constant no matter what I do or eat. Pepcid no longer works and sometimes makes it work. Tums have surprisingly been more effective. I really do not like being pregnant, and have been pleased to see articles popping up around the place written by other women who also hate being pregnant. I love the results, which is why I'm doing this for the third time, but the idea of doing this after this little guy makes his appearance sounds horrendous. The putting on weight and getting a huge belly doesn't really bother me so much; it's everything that goes along with it that I don't like. I decided to make my own list of what I hate about being pregnant:
-the pelvic pain: not everyone experiences this, but for me, it's pretty much like someone is taking a jackhammer to my pelvis constantly. It got nearly unbearable a few weeks ago, and I could hardly walk for a few days. I almost though I was going into labor early with as bad as it hurt, but fortunately it improved slightly after a few days. It's worse at night- getting out of bed to pee every 2 hours (or less) is quite the painful ordeal.
-having to pee CONSTANTLY- ever before you get very big, you have to pee a ton more, but when I get toward the last couple months, I have to pee sometimes every 30 minutes. I can usually hold off longer at night, provided that I can get to sleep before the urge hits, but then it's a contest to see if I can make it to the bathroom before I lose bladder control. So far I have always won..... except for one morning when I was sick and coughing really hard...... fortunately I hadn't showered yet.
-acid reflux: I've tried being careful about what I eat before I go to bed, not eating before going to bed, avoiding certain foods, and it doesn't matter. I basically am constantly walking around (or lying down) with the feeling of a pool of vomit sitting in the back of my throat, which makes for an unpleasant sore throat in the morning. So, bring on the Sriracha, it doesn't make a difference! Fortunately, it immediately goes way once baby comes out and my stomach moves from the back of my throat to where it belong. But going 3/4 of a year with constant heartburn really blows.
-belly is in the way of everything: I accidentally ram my kids with it all the time. I try to help Madelynn with her hair- BAM! oops, sorry I knocked you off the stool or caused you to run into the wall. Gotta be careful when cooking over the stove- don't want to light myself on fire. I knock things over all the time, run into walls and doors.
-immune system surpressed, but you can't take anything! This is the one irony that drives me crazy- being sick when pregnant is significantly more unpleasant than when not being pregnant, and my immune system is already suppressed, so I catch something every 2-3 weeks. And there are so many things I can't take! Oh, if I could just take ibuprofen for some of the pain, it would be heavenly! Even alternative remedies you have to be careful with- there are essential oils and other natural remedies that you have to avoid as well, so it can be difficult to find alternatives to the more traditional go-to remedies. Like Kava- oh, if I could take kava, sleeping would be so much easier. It just seems cruel that you feel exponentially crappier, and have less options for dealing with it.
There's more than that, but I want to write about dancing now. Madelynn had her winter dance review at Kearns High today. Considering their reputation for being an uber ghetto school, they had a pretty amazing auditorium, and actual dance studios in the school. I would have loved to be able to take dance classes as part of my schedule during high school! I felt like I had taken Madelynn to the Little Miss Sunshine pageant times a thousand walking around, and there were some pretty obnoxious dance moms there. Like the one a few rows ahead of us that screamed "GO MACY!" throughout the ENTIRE performance of her daughter's dance. I'm glad that Madelynn wasn't in the class, and feel bad that all the parents who attempted to record that dance have to hear a crazy woman screaming constantly and not the music. Most parents chose to get their screaming out as the dancers were taking the stage and shut their mouths as soon as the music started. Except for the occasional random scream. The exception was the 6-7 year old breakdance class- I have no idea what music was actually playing because it was constant screaming and whistling. It was so bad I had to cover Ian's ears so he wouldn't freak out, and I think I may have some noise induced hearing loss from the shrill whistling from the people behind me. Yeah, real classy, guys. Madelynn's class was great, and I was able to record the entire dance with no random interruptions of screaming throughout the dance so I could send it to Nate and my mom and others who were unable to attend. A dad sitting in the row in front of us even made his daughter scrunch down in her seat while I was filming it so that she wouldn't get in the way of the video (she was really squirmy and standing up a lot, sitting on top of the flipped up seat, but her awesome dad made her cut it out just so I could get a good shot, which was awesome. The rest of the time I didn't care, because I could see fine over her.) Madelynn was the best dancer in her class- honestly. I can say that, because none of the other parents of the kids in her class read this blog or even know my name. She was perfectly on rhythm and remembered all the moves. I definitely want to keep her going in dance, but maybe at a less sparkly foofy insane costume weird dance moms studio, if that's even possible to avoid in Utah. Plus, the cost of the costumes are insane, and what the crap am I supposed to do with a bunch of sequined leotards and feathered boa skirts (to make it's appearance at the spring review, at least the feathers that don't end up all over the carpet).
Ian was very excited to see his big sister dance, and was a delightful
audience member. I am apparently a horrible mother, though, because I
didn't get her a giant bouquet of flowers to present her with at the end
of the performance like all the other girls got, so she pouted for
about an hour afterwards. Apparently taking her to get donuts and
cinnamon rolls afterwards isn't good enough. It brought me back to
Valentines when I lived in Utah when I was younger and girls in THIRD
GRADE were getting boxes of chocolates from boys. Multiple boxes. And by
middle school, it was bouquets of flowers, balloons, and teddy bears
delivered to you in the middle of class by the boy you were "going out
with" and then you carried it around the rest of the day so the rest of
us would feel like crap and go home and cry because we were losers for
not having boyfriends at the age of 11. I would hope that's been reigned
in by now- it was getting so bad that parents were having flowers and
chocolates delivered to their daughters so they wouldn't feel like crap
on Valentines Day. And if the boys in Madelynn's kindergarten class
bring her boxes of chocolates and flowers on Valentine's Day, I will
hunt them down! Well, more like their parents, because Madelynn is SIX.
And the boys already are smitten with her- I watch them when I take her
to school. She is everything I wasn't socially at that age- friendly,
outgoing, and socially competent. And blonde. Fortunately extremely nice
as well, but I still have that fear in the back of my mind that she
will grow up to be a "mean girl." She's pretty sensitive to when others
are mean, though, and it really bothers her, so at least for now we're
good.
Nate unfortunately had to miss her dance recital because he was in Oregon at his Grandma's funeral, which was actually happening at the exact same time Madelynn was dancing on stage. His Grandma passed away on Monday of complications from pneumonia (went into septic shock and caused kidney failure). It wasn't exactly expected, but not unexpected, either. She did live to the ripe old age of 92 and has been looking forward to being reunited with Nate's grandpa for a long time, and also Nate's mom since she passed away 18 months ago. He drove to Medford with his cousin on Thursday after work, and will be home tomorrow evening. I'm making a high-end dinner of hot dogs when he gets home. (Well, I did get good stuff- brats and kielbasa). I was really nervous about him leaving when I'm this far along in the pregnancy because I wasn't sure how I would be able to handle everything on my own, and also a teensy worried that my body would decide to go into labor while he was gone, but the kids have been mostly great, with only a few meltdowns (mostly from Ian- I swear 3 is a much harder age than 2. My kids are easy when they're 2- it's when they turn 3 that they get difficult.) And so far, no indications that baby is going to make a slightly early appearance, so I think we're good. (knock on wood that my water doesn't break tonight). I've even been able to sneak naps in, which I basically can't survive without at this point- turn on the movie "Hairspray" and my kids are hypnotized for a good chunk of time and Mommy can pass out on the recliner just a few feet away. This is probably the only time I've been anxiously looking forward to the weekend being over.
Oh whoops, my water just broke. Off to the hospital! Okay, not really. I probably won't be posting anything on here until I've got a new baby in my arms, because I don't know how much longer I will be able to write a coherent sentence between now and then, and also because I pretty much want to nap all the time and eat oranges.
My due date is exactly 4 weeks from today- Feb 21. I'm feeling relatively good, considering that I'm over 8 months pregnant. Eating pretty much whatever I feel like, mostly because I have horrendous acid reflux that is ever present and constant no matter what I do or eat. Pepcid no longer works and sometimes makes it work. Tums have surprisingly been more effective. I really do not like being pregnant, and have been pleased to see articles popping up around the place written by other women who also hate being pregnant. I love the results, which is why I'm doing this for the third time, but the idea of doing this after this little guy makes his appearance sounds horrendous. The putting on weight and getting a huge belly doesn't really bother me so much; it's everything that goes along with it that I don't like. I decided to make my own list of what I hate about being pregnant:
-the pelvic pain: not everyone experiences this, but for me, it's pretty much like someone is taking a jackhammer to my pelvis constantly. It got nearly unbearable a few weeks ago, and I could hardly walk for a few days. I almost though I was going into labor early with as bad as it hurt, but fortunately it improved slightly after a few days. It's worse at night- getting out of bed to pee every 2 hours (or less) is quite the painful ordeal.
-having to pee CONSTANTLY- ever before you get very big, you have to pee a ton more, but when I get toward the last couple months, I have to pee sometimes every 30 minutes. I can usually hold off longer at night, provided that I can get to sleep before the urge hits, but then it's a contest to see if I can make it to the bathroom before I lose bladder control. So far I have always won..... except for one morning when I was sick and coughing really hard...... fortunately I hadn't showered yet.
-acid reflux: I've tried being careful about what I eat before I go to bed, not eating before going to bed, avoiding certain foods, and it doesn't matter. I basically am constantly walking around (or lying down) with the feeling of a pool of vomit sitting in the back of my throat, which makes for an unpleasant sore throat in the morning. So, bring on the Sriracha, it doesn't make a difference! Fortunately, it immediately goes way once baby comes out and my stomach moves from the back of my throat to where it belong. But going 3/4 of a year with constant heartburn really blows.
-belly is in the way of everything: I accidentally ram my kids with it all the time. I try to help Madelynn with her hair- BAM! oops, sorry I knocked you off the stool or caused you to run into the wall. Gotta be careful when cooking over the stove- don't want to light myself on fire. I knock things over all the time, run into walls and doors.
-immune system surpressed, but you can't take anything! This is the one irony that drives me crazy- being sick when pregnant is significantly more unpleasant than when not being pregnant, and my immune system is already suppressed, so I catch something every 2-3 weeks. And there are so many things I can't take! Oh, if I could just take ibuprofen for some of the pain, it would be heavenly! Even alternative remedies you have to be careful with- there are essential oils and other natural remedies that you have to avoid as well, so it can be difficult to find alternatives to the more traditional go-to remedies. Like Kava- oh, if I could take kava, sleeping would be so much easier. It just seems cruel that you feel exponentially crappier, and have less options for dealing with it.
There's more than that, but I want to write about dancing now. Madelynn had her winter dance review at Kearns High today. Considering their reputation for being an uber ghetto school, they had a pretty amazing auditorium, and actual dance studios in the school. I would have loved to be able to take dance classes as part of my schedule during high school! I felt like I had taken Madelynn to the Little Miss Sunshine pageant times a thousand walking around, and there were some pretty obnoxious dance moms there. Like the one a few rows ahead of us that screamed "GO MACY!" throughout the ENTIRE performance of her daughter's dance. I'm glad that Madelynn wasn't in the class, and feel bad that all the parents who attempted to record that dance have to hear a crazy woman screaming constantly and not the music. Most parents chose to get their screaming out as the dancers were taking the stage and shut their mouths as soon as the music started. Except for the occasional random scream. The exception was the 6-7 year old breakdance class- I have no idea what music was actually playing because it was constant screaming and whistling. It was so bad I had to cover Ian's ears so he wouldn't freak out, and I think I may have some noise induced hearing loss from the shrill whistling from the people behind me. Yeah, real classy, guys. Madelynn's class was great, and I was able to record the entire dance with no random interruptions of screaming throughout the dance so I could send it to Nate and my mom and others who were unable to attend. A dad sitting in the row in front of us even made his daughter scrunch down in her seat while I was filming it so that she wouldn't get in the way of the video (she was really squirmy and standing up a lot, sitting on top of the flipped up seat, but her awesome dad made her cut it out just so I could get a good shot, which was awesome. The rest of the time I didn't care, because I could see fine over her.) Madelynn was the best dancer in her class- honestly. I can say that, because none of the other parents of the kids in her class read this blog or even know my name. She was perfectly on rhythm and remembered all the moves. I definitely want to keep her going in dance, but maybe at a less sparkly foofy insane costume weird dance moms studio, if that's even possible to avoid in Utah. Plus, the cost of the costumes are insane, and what the crap am I supposed to do with a bunch of sequined leotards and feathered boa skirts (to make it's appearance at the spring review, at least the feathers that don't end up all over the carpet).
Nate unfortunately had to miss her dance recital because he was in Oregon at his Grandma's funeral, which was actually happening at the exact same time Madelynn was dancing on stage. His Grandma passed away on Monday of complications from pneumonia (went into septic shock and caused kidney failure). It wasn't exactly expected, but not unexpected, either. She did live to the ripe old age of 92 and has been looking forward to being reunited with Nate's grandpa for a long time, and also Nate's mom since she passed away 18 months ago. He drove to Medford with his cousin on Thursday after work, and will be home tomorrow evening. I'm making a high-end dinner of hot dogs when he gets home. (Well, I did get good stuff- brats and kielbasa). I was really nervous about him leaving when I'm this far along in the pregnancy because I wasn't sure how I would be able to handle everything on my own, and also a teensy worried that my body would decide to go into labor while he was gone, but the kids have been mostly great, with only a few meltdowns (mostly from Ian- I swear 3 is a much harder age than 2. My kids are easy when they're 2- it's when they turn 3 that they get difficult.) And so far, no indications that baby is going to make a slightly early appearance, so I think we're good. (knock on wood that my water doesn't break tonight). I've even been able to sneak naps in, which I basically can't survive without at this point- turn on the movie "Hairspray" and my kids are hypnotized for a good chunk of time and Mommy can pass out on the recliner just a few feet away. This is probably the only time I've been anxiously looking forward to the weekend being over.
Oh whoops, my water just broke. Off to the hospital! Okay, not really. I probably won't be posting anything on here until I've got a new baby in my arms, because I don't know how much longer I will be able to write a coherent sentence between now and then, and also because I pretty much want to nap all the time and eat oranges.
Thursday, December 11, 2014
The grumpy list
It's been a bit of an off week for us. Nate's students have been insane and also compulsively lying to him (I swear I turned in every single one of those assignments that has a zero! I mean, I um, lost all of them, Why won't you give me credit for work I didn't turn in?) , the kids have both had their 3rd GI ailment since mid-October, and I've been in a lot more pain and discomfort. So I made chocolate peanut butter fudge. But still, it's that time of year that's a bit of a mixed bag, especially since 2011, and being here hasn't helped make it any better, so I have decided to make a list of things that are currently making me grumpy at this point because it's cathartic. Also, I might mention pee, blood, and my uterus:
-CHRISTMAS ADS: I like Christmas- music (traditional songs, not the really annoying modern ones that are uber-obnoxious), but it's also unpleasant being punched in the face with "BUY, BUY, BUY" as soon as Halloween is over. Virtually everything that showed up in the massive amounts of black friday ads looked like garbage. The expectation for the size of gifts has gotten so out of control, I am just glad that my kids are still too young for me to worry about them demanding iPads, video games consoles, cell phones, and automobiles. And they will never get them even if they do, unless they want an old atari found at a thrift store or hot wheels. Personally, I think the best gifts involve either something edible, something handmade, or an event, like going out for ice cream or to a lucha libre. Or offering to take your kids for the night so that your husband can stay the night with you in the hospital after you have a baby so that you don't have to take care of an hours old newborn by yourself right after having your insides ripped out while also having psychotically painful contractions as your uterus shrinks.Which brings me to:
-BEING PREGNANT: I do not like being pregnant, but I keep doing it because I'm rather fond of the end result. It hurts really bad. I have really bad pelvic pain that gets increasingly worse with each pregnancy, and I am desperately hoping this is the last time I am pregnant because I am not sure that I can handle the pain getting any worse. I am also to the point where I have pretty much constant acid reflux, whether I'm lying down, siting, or standing, because I think my stomach has migrated into my ribcage. Or possibly to the top of my sternum. So far, this baby doesn't seem to be sitting on my sciatic nerve like Ian did, but I've still got 10 weeks to go. The leg cramps are unpleasant and back pain are unpleasant., and bending over to pick something else is an ordeal. I look at my belly and think, wow, it still has a lot bigger to go- I think all of my clothes are going to rip apart by the end of this. I got one of those back/belly support velcro bands, and that's hit or miss. It also puts more pressure on my bladder, but sometimes I wear it just to keep my pants up. I also miss my brain- I swear I can feel my brain cells taking off. About this time of the pregnancy, I also have unexplained issues, which takes us to:
-PEEING BLOOD: With every pregnancy I've had, I always have unexplained bleeding at the beginning of the third trimester. With Madelynn, the cause was never determined, but an ultrasound did reveal that I was having pre-term labor, so I was put on bed rest and medication to stop contractions. I still ended up being induced when I was full term because the doctor was worried about me going past my due date with the issues I had been having. With Ian, I had bleeding and contractions and had to stay the night in the hospital, but then they stopped and cause of bleeding was never determined. I was also induced 5 days after my due date with him (that was at my request, though, because I was desperate for my Dad to meet his first grandson before he died.) I thought I might escape it this time, but nope, last Friday I randomly started bleeding- not enough to warrant rushing to the ER, but enough to be concerning. Since we are only 10 minutes from the hospital and this seems to be a common occurrence, I insisted on driving myself to labor and delivery to get checked out so the kids wouldn't have to get dragged along and be traumatized. After tons of tests, I was told I had been peeing blood and had a UTI, and was sent home with a prescription for an antibiotic. But then was told a few days later after lab results came in that I didn't actually have a UTI either and they had no idea why I was peeing blood. So glad I get to pay a butt load of $$$ (and that's WITH insurance) to be poked and prodded and told that no one has any idea why I was bleeding.
-THIS IS THE PLACE- If you are from here: I had somewhat of an idea of what to expect when we moved here, since I had lived in this state for a few years when I was younger. I was hoping that the culture of being very insular and wary of outsiders had changed since then, or maybe it was just a Cache Valley thing. Yeah, no. If you're not from here, you are an outsider and most people are so involved in their own lives that they really don't give a rip about you. This is partially due to the fact that we chose the wrong area to live- the majority of the people near us are from here, have their entire families here, and why get out of your comfort zone when everything is already peachy? Madelynn has had 1 playdate since we've been here. I've tried to set up a couple others, but there hasn't been any follow through on the other end. Ian was the only kid in his preschool that didn't have a huge family gathering to go to, because our family is either dead or living in another state. We did get invited to dinner once, though- by one of Nate's old friends from high school that also happens to live here, which means that they were outsiders, too. People are perfectly nice here, but only associate with you within the context that they know you from. If they know you from church, they will talk to you at church, but you do not exist outside of Sunday between the hours of 9 and 12. It's kind of like the little kid that thinks his teacher lives at school. There also is a bit of a doomsday mentality here- I constantly here about how the world is terrifying, getting worse all the time, the end is near, so stay inside and stock up on your food storage and keep your children away from the evil influences of the world. And maybe home school them. I have heard multiple people refer to anything outside of Utah as "the mission field" WTF? To that I say- there has always been plenty of evil in the world, so go out and be the good influence. We are trying to find an area that is more receptive to "outsiders" (yeah, you wouldn't think a Mormon would be considered an outsider in Utah, would you). I am terrified of anything major happening to us here, because I don't know if anyone would help us out. I'm just glad this pregnancy hasn't had any complications, because I absolutely cannot go on bed rest here with two young kids, and I'm going to start freezing a bunch of meals at the beginning of February so we have something decent to eat.
-HOW MUCH IT COST TO GET HERE: We had paid off both of our credit cards. And then we realized we were moving to Utah, and had to spend a few thousand dollars to get here. Moving is expensive. It's not so bad when you move someplace that you are excited to move to, because then you can say it was worth it. I am still waiting for that feeling, right now I feel more like I spent a bunch of money so someone could give me a bad case of diarrhea. With what it cost to get here, we're not going to be packing up anytime soon, and are trying to make the best of things. Okay, it's not completely horrible here, but it's not home. And it's not green. And we're not 1 hour from the ocean. And I can't go out to my backyard for a snack when I get hungry; I don't even have a backyard to go out to. Taking a pay cut to move somewhere where cost of living isn't actually any different than where we came from wasn't so fun, either, but at least I am fairly fond of my job and it's significantly less stressful than my last one, so it's okay. We pretty much knew we were going to have to leave Oregon for one place or another thanks to something called the Spanish Orela, but that doesn't mean we had to be excited about it!
-TINY CHAIRS: Adult chairs do not exist where I work. The only people who get comfortable adult-size chairs are administrations and people that work at the district office. Teachers get whatever happens to be the size of the chair their students sit in, unless you teach really little kids, then you get an extra 1-2 chairs that fit 9 year olds in your room for your "big person" chair. You must bring your own chair (and then hope it doesn't disappear). I am going to start bringing a camping chair with me to work because I'm getting so big that it's incredibly painful for me to sit in the chairs built for preschoolers. I am usually given the option of sitting in the "big" chairs, but those are still too small and also painful to sit in.
-NON-EXISTENT MATERNITY LEAVE: Utah is a right to work state, which basically gives employers the right to screw you over. Utah was also ranked as the number 1 worst state for women due to discrepancy in pay, not enough childcare providers, and lack of women in high-ranking positions, to name a few. My district has no maternity leave policy- there's a big sign that says so in the workroom where my mailbox is. I am only protected to use up to 10 days of sick leave (of which I have already had to take from sick kids and being sick myself), have the option of using my personal leave, and can request and additional 15 days of unpaid leave. I am not protected under FMLA because I don't work full-time and I haven't been employed with the district for a year. (I picked the wrong country to have babies in). That means that basically I can take a little over a month off and still have my job protected. But I do not recover that quickly and am planning on taking a full 12-week leave. I could get fired if my boss felt like it, but fortunately she's also a mom and is understanding of people having babies and is supportive of me taking whatever time off I need, even though she doesn't have to be. Granted, in my field, even if I was cut from my position, I could easily find another one or do teletherapy.
-APARTMENTS: We really really really wanted to rent a house, or at least a townhouse, when we moved here. But alas, none of the rental companies would either answer there phone, return calls or show us houses because we weren't moving here for a month when we came to look at places. I have found that the not answering phones thing is a fairly common and irritating habit of many here. So, that meant we were pretty much stuck with getting an apartment, and drove around just hoping to find something decent. And of course, none of the communities had any available townhouses, so we were stuck with a flat. And those really obnoxious vertical blinds in front of the sliding glass doors and a carpeted dining room. It's super fun picking out cereal that has become encrusted in the fibers. We also seem to have managed to end up in the building where everyone around us smokes, which means that during warm weather, we can't enjoy sitting on our porch without inhaling turd air, and the laundry room vent picks up the smoke from the outside and sucks it into our laundry room. The neighbors above us also apparently have pet dinosaurs and are believers in the cry it out method with their baby, which is not very considerate at 3 am. And have some sort of piece of furniture that is constantly getting rolled across the floor, I have no idea what in the world they do up there, other than I know their children are fond of jumping off the furniture, but maybe they don't know because they're always outside sending us cancer clouds. I know that part of the issue is that the soundproofing between the our ceiling and their floor just sucks because it's a large apartment community and developers like to cut corners to save a buck or two, but there is no reason that it should constantly sound like a herd of dinosaurs stomping on our heads.
Well, I feel a little bit better. Sometimes I think I am a total ass for feeling upset and not particularly cheerful, but it's okay that I feel that way. We all have our struggles, and there will always be someone who has it worse off than you, but that doesn't mean that your feelings aren't legitimate. I think it's important that we recognize and accept how we feel instead of feeling guilty for feeling a certain way, and also recognize and accept how other people feel as well.
-CHRISTMAS ADS: I like Christmas- music (traditional songs, not the really annoying modern ones that are uber-obnoxious), but it's also unpleasant being punched in the face with "BUY, BUY, BUY" as soon as Halloween is over. Virtually everything that showed up in the massive amounts of black friday ads looked like garbage. The expectation for the size of gifts has gotten so out of control, I am just glad that my kids are still too young for me to worry about them demanding iPads, video games consoles, cell phones, and automobiles. And they will never get them even if they do, unless they want an old atari found at a thrift store or hot wheels. Personally, I think the best gifts involve either something edible, something handmade, or an event, like going out for ice cream or to a lucha libre. Or offering to take your kids for the night so that your husband can stay the night with you in the hospital after you have a baby so that you don't have to take care of an hours old newborn by yourself right after having your insides ripped out while also having psychotically painful contractions as your uterus shrinks.Which brings me to:
-BEING PREGNANT: I do not like being pregnant, but I keep doing it because I'm rather fond of the end result. It hurts really bad. I have really bad pelvic pain that gets increasingly worse with each pregnancy, and I am desperately hoping this is the last time I am pregnant because I am not sure that I can handle the pain getting any worse. I am also to the point where I have pretty much constant acid reflux, whether I'm lying down, siting, or standing, because I think my stomach has migrated into my ribcage. Or possibly to the top of my sternum. So far, this baby doesn't seem to be sitting on my sciatic nerve like Ian did, but I've still got 10 weeks to go. The leg cramps are unpleasant and back pain are unpleasant., and bending over to pick something else is an ordeal. I look at my belly and think, wow, it still has a lot bigger to go- I think all of my clothes are going to rip apart by the end of this. I got one of those back/belly support velcro bands, and that's hit or miss. It also puts more pressure on my bladder, but sometimes I wear it just to keep my pants up. I also miss my brain- I swear I can feel my brain cells taking off. About this time of the pregnancy, I also have unexplained issues, which takes us to:
-PEEING BLOOD: With every pregnancy I've had, I always have unexplained bleeding at the beginning of the third trimester. With Madelynn, the cause was never determined, but an ultrasound did reveal that I was having pre-term labor, so I was put on bed rest and medication to stop contractions. I still ended up being induced when I was full term because the doctor was worried about me going past my due date with the issues I had been having. With Ian, I had bleeding and contractions and had to stay the night in the hospital, but then they stopped and cause of bleeding was never determined. I was also induced 5 days after my due date with him (that was at my request, though, because I was desperate for my Dad to meet his first grandson before he died.) I thought I might escape it this time, but nope, last Friday I randomly started bleeding- not enough to warrant rushing to the ER, but enough to be concerning. Since we are only 10 minutes from the hospital and this seems to be a common occurrence, I insisted on driving myself to labor and delivery to get checked out so the kids wouldn't have to get dragged along and be traumatized. After tons of tests, I was told I had been peeing blood and had a UTI, and was sent home with a prescription for an antibiotic. But then was told a few days later after lab results came in that I didn't actually have a UTI either and they had no idea why I was peeing blood. So glad I get to pay a butt load of $$$ (and that's WITH insurance) to be poked and prodded and told that no one has any idea why I was bleeding.
-THIS IS THE PLACE- If you are from here: I had somewhat of an idea of what to expect when we moved here, since I had lived in this state for a few years when I was younger. I was hoping that the culture of being very insular and wary of outsiders had changed since then, or maybe it was just a Cache Valley thing. Yeah, no. If you're not from here, you are an outsider and most people are so involved in their own lives that they really don't give a rip about you. This is partially due to the fact that we chose the wrong area to live- the majority of the people near us are from here, have their entire families here, and why get out of your comfort zone when everything is already peachy? Madelynn has had 1 playdate since we've been here. I've tried to set up a couple others, but there hasn't been any follow through on the other end. Ian was the only kid in his preschool that didn't have a huge family gathering to go to, because our family is either dead or living in another state. We did get invited to dinner once, though- by one of Nate's old friends from high school that also happens to live here, which means that they were outsiders, too. People are perfectly nice here, but only associate with you within the context that they know you from. If they know you from church, they will talk to you at church, but you do not exist outside of Sunday between the hours of 9 and 12. It's kind of like the little kid that thinks his teacher lives at school. There also is a bit of a doomsday mentality here- I constantly here about how the world is terrifying, getting worse all the time, the end is near, so stay inside and stock up on your food storage and keep your children away from the evil influences of the world. And maybe home school them. I have heard multiple people refer to anything outside of Utah as "the mission field" WTF? To that I say- there has always been plenty of evil in the world, so go out and be the good influence. We are trying to find an area that is more receptive to "outsiders" (yeah, you wouldn't think a Mormon would be considered an outsider in Utah, would you). I am terrified of anything major happening to us here, because I don't know if anyone would help us out. I'm just glad this pregnancy hasn't had any complications, because I absolutely cannot go on bed rest here with two young kids, and I'm going to start freezing a bunch of meals at the beginning of February so we have something decent to eat.
-HOW MUCH IT COST TO GET HERE: We had paid off both of our credit cards. And then we realized we were moving to Utah, and had to spend a few thousand dollars to get here. Moving is expensive. It's not so bad when you move someplace that you are excited to move to, because then you can say it was worth it. I am still waiting for that feeling, right now I feel more like I spent a bunch of money so someone could give me a bad case of diarrhea. With what it cost to get here, we're not going to be packing up anytime soon, and are trying to make the best of things. Okay, it's not completely horrible here, but it's not home. And it's not green. And we're not 1 hour from the ocean. And I can't go out to my backyard for a snack when I get hungry; I don't even have a backyard to go out to. Taking a pay cut to move somewhere where cost of living isn't actually any different than where we came from wasn't so fun, either, but at least I am fairly fond of my job and it's significantly less stressful than my last one, so it's okay. We pretty much knew we were going to have to leave Oregon for one place or another thanks to something called the Spanish Orela, but that doesn't mean we had to be excited about it!
-TINY CHAIRS: Adult chairs do not exist where I work. The only people who get comfortable adult-size chairs are administrations and people that work at the district office. Teachers get whatever happens to be the size of the chair their students sit in, unless you teach really little kids, then you get an extra 1-2 chairs that fit 9 year olds in your room for your "big person" chair. You must bring your own chair (and then hope it doesn't disappear). I am going to start bringing a camping chair with me to work because I'm getting so big that it's incredibly painful for me to sit in the chairs built for preschoolers. I am usually given the option of sitting in the "big" chairs, but those are still too small and also painful to sit in.
-NON-EXISTENT MATERNITY LEAVE: Utah is a right to work state, which basically gives employers the right to screw you over. Utah was also ranked as the number 1 worst state for women due to discrepancy in pay, not enough childcare providers, and lack of women in high-ranking positions, to name a few. My district has no maternity leave policy- there's a big sign that says so in the workroom where my mailbox is. I am only protected to use up to 10 days of sick leave (of which I have already had to take from sick kids and being sick myself), have the option of using my personal leave, and can request and additional 15 days of unpaid leave. I am not protected under FMLA because I don't work full-time and I haven't been employed with the district for a year. (I picked the wrong country to have babies in). That means that basically I can take a little over a month off and still have my job protected. But I do not recover that quickly and am planning on taking a full 12-week leave. I could get fired if my boss felt like it, but fortunately she's also a mom and is understanding of people having babies and is supportive of me taking whatever time off I need, even though she doesn't have to be. Granted, in my field, even if I was cut from my position, I could easily find another one or do teletherapy.
-APARTMENTS: We really really really wanted to rent a house, or at least a townhouse, when we moved here. But alas, none of the rental companies would either answer there phone, return calls or show us houses because we weren't moving here for a month when we came to look at places. I have found that the not answering phones thing is a fairly common and irritating habit of many here. So, that meant we were pretty much stuck with getting an apartment, and drove around just hoping to find something decent. And of course, none of the communities had any available townhouses, so we were stuck with a flat. And those really obnoxious vertical blinds in front of the sliding glass doors and a carpeted dining room. It's super fun picking out cereal that has become encrusted in the fibers. We also seem to have managed to end up in the building where everyone around us smokes, which means that during warm weather, we can't enjoy sitting on our porch without inhaling turd air, and the laundry room vent picks up the smoke from the outside and sucks it into our laundry room. The neighbors above us also apparently have pet dinosaurs and are believers in the cry it out method with their baby, which is not very considerate at 3 am. And have some sort of piece of furniture that is constantly getting rolled across the floor, I have no idea what in the world they do up there, other than I know their children are fond of jumping off the furniture, but maybe they don't know because they're always outside sending us cancer clouds. I know that part of the issue is that the soundproofing between the our ceiling and their floor just sucks because it's a large apartment community and developers like to cut corners to save a buck or two, but there is no reason that it should constantly sound like a herd of dinosaurs stomping on our heads.
Well, I feel a little bit better. Sometimes I think I am a total ass for feeling upset and not particularly cheerful, but it's okay that I feel that way. We all have our struggles, and there will always be someone who has it worse off than you, but that doesn't mean that your feelings aren't legitimate. I think it's important that we recognize and accept how we feel instead of feeling guilty for feeling a certain way, and also recognize and accept how other people feel as well.
Tuesday, November 4, 2014
Confessions and rolls
I have to confess three things:
1. I love tootsie rolls. A lot. Even though we just went through way too much candy over the past few weeks, I bought a bag of tootsie rolls on halloween clearance yesterday- the big, chunky ones. I have been eating them all day while my son has been vomiting. Okay, not at the same time he has been vomiting, because that would be terrible.
2. I didn't vote today because I'm not registered to vote in the state of Utah. Nate and I really don't want to get Utah driver's licenses or license plates, and are holding off until we absolutely have to. We do have liberary cards, though! I also am pretty sure that my vote is meaningless in this state, where politicians show up to high schools and tell students that college is stupid and that the state actually has plenty of money that it could spend on education but it won't because of Common Core. (Read more about that in a future post on my other blog.) It's hard to put the effort into doing all of the things necessary in order to vote when you are a small blue dot in a sea of red and your ballot might as well be used for toilet paper. Were I still in Oregon, I would have most definitely voted. Also because voting by mail is awesome.
3. I am starting to like it here. Sure, there are things about this place that are messed up, like a lot of really psychotic drivers (I had a guy freaking out on my the other day driving behind me because I was going the speed limit. Through a neighborhood. I'm not really into hitting people with my car.), church is quite different here- rather than the "Be a good example and love everyone" mentality that I am used to, we get a lot of "The world is a bad place, the end of the world is coming soon, we're all being personally attacked, etc." It's really strange. And the view of the pillaged Oquirrh mountains is rather dismal. But, we are meeting some pretty cool people that I am pretty sure aren't insane, there's a lot of amazing hiking and skiing (even though I can't ski this year and doubt I will ever get back into alpine skiing since the last time I went I was 13), tons of fun events and places to go, great parks (our kids are obsessed with Liberty Park), and if we do need to escape, then the Salt Lake airport is nearby. Plus, yesterday it snowed a ton up in the mountains and they look awesome covered in white. A huge improvement in the areas that have been cut away for the sake of minerals and granite countertops. I sometimes feel like a fish out of water, literally, because I actually like rain and am probably really some sort of amphibious creature, but the increase in sunshine has been good for the mood. I get really sleepy and lethargic when it's rainy and overcast, as much as I love it, and I am better about being alert when there is more sunshine, even though it kind of burns.
Now, onto the part about rolls:
I have an amazing roll recipe that must be shared. It's from my maternal grandmother, and I use it a lot. They're great dipped in soup, slathered in butter and jam, and if you make them huge, they also make great buns for sloppy joe's. It's also a great dough to use for making cinnamon rolls. If you are part of the Fryer clan and haven't had these before, you are missing out! Mine aren't the prettiest, but taste pretty darn good. And here you go:
Grandma Fryer's Roll Dough
1 pkg yeast
2 cups hot water
1/4 cup margarine
1/2 cup sugar
2 tsp salt
2 eggs
7-8 cups flour
*note: this recipe makes a LOT of rolls. When I made these a couple of days ago, I halved the recipe and still have a few leftover rolls.
Dissolve yeast with a little warm water and sugar. Combine hot water, margarine, sugar, salt and eggs in large mixing bowl. Add two cups of flower and the yeast mixture. Mix, then add enough flour to make a soft dough. Don't add too much flour-- it should still be a little sticky but not too hard to handle. Put in a greased bowl and let rise until double. Punch down dough and let it rest for 15 minutes before shaping into rolls or bread. Let rise again after shaping. Bake rolls at 425 for 12 minutes.
I sometimes get impatient and don't let mine rise enough, but they still taste good.
On a final, unrelated note, kids grow up too fast. Madelynn decided to start losing teeth this month, and has lost her bottom two central incisors. She's our little fashionista with opinions galore, is an amazing big sister (she took Ian to the bathroom this morning to throw up while I was in another room), has an amusingly high vocabulary, and likes tootsie rolls just as much as her mother. And now she is this big and is very proud of her new sparkly boots:
.jpg)
1. I love tootsie rolls. A lot. Even though we just went through way too much candy over the past few weeks, I bought a bag of tootsie rolls on halloween clearance yesterday- the big, chunky ones. I have been eating them all day while my son has been vomiting. Okay, not at the same time he has been vomiting, because that would be terrible.
2. I didn't vote today because I'm not registered to vote in the state of Utah. Nate and I really don't want to get Utah driver's licenses or license plates, and are holding off until we absolutely have to. We do have liberary cards, though! I also am pretty sure that my vote is meaningless in this state, where politicians show up to high schools and tell students that college is stupid and that the state actually has plenty of money that it could spend on education but it won't because of Common Core. (Read more about that in a future post on my other blog.) It's hard to put the effort into doing all of the things necessary in order to vote when you are a small blue dot in a sea of red and your ballot might as well be used for toilet paper. Were I still in Oregon, I would have most definitely voted. Also because voting by mail is awesome.
3. I am starting to like it here. Sure, there are things about this place that are messed up, like a lot of really psychotic drivers (I had a guy freaking out on my the other day driving behind me because I was going the speed limit. Through a neighborhood. I'm not really into hitting people with my car.), church is quite different here- rather than the "Be a good example and love everyone" mentality that I am used to, we get a lot of "The world is a bad place, the end of the world is coming soon, we're all being personally attacked, etc." It's really strange. And the view of the pillaged Oquirrh mountains is rather dismal. But, we are meeting some pretty cool people that I am pretty sure aren't insane, there's a lot of amazing hiking and skiing (even though I can't ski this year and doubt I will ever get back into alpine skiing since the last time I went I was 13), tons of fun events and places to go, great parks (our kids are obsessed with Liberty Park), and if we do need to escape, then the Salt Lake airport is nearby. Plus, yesterday it snowed a ton up in the mountains and they look awesome covered in white. A huge improvement in the areas that have been cut away for the sake of minerals and granite countertops. I sometimes feel like a fish out of water, literally, because I actually like rain and am probably really some sort of amphibious creature, but the increase in sunshine has been good for the mood. I get really sleepy and lethargic when it's rainy and overcast, as much as I love it, and I am better about being alert when there is more sunshine, even though it kind of burns.
Now, onto the part about rolls:
I have an amazing roll recipe that must be shared. It's from my maternal grandmother, and I use it a lot. They're great dipped in soup, slathered in butter and jam, and if you make them huge, they also make great buns for sloppy joe's. It's also a great dough to use for making cinnamon rolls. If you are part of the Fryer clan and haven't had these before, you are missing out! Mine aren't the prettiest, but taste pretty darn good. And here you go:
Grandma Fryer's Roll Dough
1 pkg yeast
2 cups hot water
1/4 cup margarine
1/2 cup sugar
2 tsp salt
2 eggs
7-8 cups flour
*note: this recipe makes a LOT of rolls. When I made these a couple of days ago, I halved the recipe and still have a few leftover rolls.
Dissolve yeast with a little warm water and sugar. Combine hot water, margarine, sugar, salt and eggs in large mixing bowl. Add two cups of flower and the yeast mixture. Mix, then add enough flour to make a soft dough. Don't add too much flour-- it should still be a little sticky but not too hard to handle. Put in a greased bowl and let rise until double. Punch down dough and let it rest for 15 minutes before shaping into rolls or bread. Let rise again after shaping. Bake rolls at 425 for 12 minutes.
I sometimes get impatient and don't let mine rise enough, but they still taste good.
On a final, unrelated note, kids grow up too fast. Madelynn decided to start losing teeth this month, and has lost her bottom two central incisors. She's our little fashionista with opinions galore, is an amazing big sister (she took Ian to the bathroom this morning to throw up while I was in another room), has an amusingly high vocabulary, and likes tootsie rolls just as much as her mother. And now she is this big and is very proud of her new sparkly boots:
Sunday, October 5, 2014
About a blog
I love to write, and I've always loved to write. When I was in second grade, I would write these ridiculously long stories for writing assignments in class (we're talking pages and pages and pages) because I LOVED to write and was convinced that I was going to grow up to become a writer. I was fortunate that I spent the first 3 years of my public school education at a school with alternative education options and my parents placed me in those classes that were more learn at your own pace, self-driven, and had more differentiated instruction for different levels. I was able to thrive academically in that environment, which was why I was able to spend so much time writing ridiculous stories and reading The Secret Garden and other more advanced books with my reading group when I was seven, rather than beating my head against my desk because I was so bored. Don't get me wrong, I didn't have the greatest attitude about going to school, and some of this was due to the fact that I was ridiculously shy. You could say I was socially retarded. I am not kidding. I have no idea how I always managed to have a good amount of friends, especially back then, when I was too terrified to say "hi" back to anyone that greeted me. There was one time I saw one of my good friends at the store, and when they said "hi", I said nothing. My Dad looked at me like I was insane. But then I got better, the end. Okay, this whole first paragraph has steered completely off course from what I started off writing about. Let's try again:
So, what all this rambling is building up to is, I am starting a new, separate blog. I have been thinking about doing this for a while, but haven't been totally sure what to write about. Or what to name it. Or who to target it to. This blog right here was originally created when we were doing a study abroad in Mexico in 2010 to post photos and write about our adventures, and then I just continued posting. I will still post in this one, but would like to keep it to writing about my family and personal experiences. Trips, adventures in moving, weird things my kids do, etc. This other one will be about.... other things. And perhaps a bit more controversial. Maybe. I don't know. I don't set out intending to make things controversial, but as I have from a few things I have posted and/or responded to on facebook a few years ago, there is always someone who can be offended. I have even composed hypothetical posts in my head and generated likely hypothetical responses and decided that it wasn't worth it. And yes, I have hidden a number of people's posts from my newsfeed because some of them were literally completely insane and intentionally offensive or dirty.
I started working on a website three years ago because I thought it would be a great idea to provide a website with free resources for Speech-Language Pathologists. I've created a number of my own worksheets over the years, and thought it would be great to make available to others, as well as provide links to other great resources. I still think it's a good idea, but you know what? I'm not really all that passionate about it. I still intend to finish it and make it available eventually, but I don't find it to be an outlet for me that I am passionate about. I like being a speech path, but it's not my passion in life. I like my students (usually.....), and most of the parents I work with are delightful. However, it's not what keeps me motivated and driven. It is, after all, a job. A career that I have built over the years that I have been fairly pleased with, but trust me, but I don't spend my free time coming up with new and innovative therapy techniques. I spend my time off pretending I am unemployed, because I do not like to think about work. Sometimes I question whether I want to do this for the rest of my career. After last week, I was ready to up and quit my job and do telepractice to earn income. But I will save a detailed description of what working in public education actually entails for another post on another blog.
So what am I passionate about? I am passionate about my family, my religion, reading, music, food (I heart pinterest), but I don't necessarily want to write about them. Something else that I derive great please from reading, discussing, and writing about is...... social commentary. I love reading articles and blogs about things like racism, women's rights, international issues, public education, gun rights, corruption, healthcare, and income inequality, to name a few. I have a lot to say on those things, but I don't think Facebook is the correct forum for a number of reasons, one of them being that I do not want to alienate people, and another being that these can be pretty intense subjects that I think are better discussed outside of Facebook or Twitter or Instagram or whatever the new, hip thing is today. I will post links on facebook so that people can make the choice whether or not they want to read the content and decide if they would like to share it. I don't intend this to be a rant where I just vent my frustrations to the world. I do have a couple of posts in the works and should have it up within the next week or two.
Here are a few things that you should know about me when making the decision whether or not to venture into this new project of mine:
- My intention is to entertain, inform, and to make people think.
-My intention is not to enrage and polarize. However, that being said, I can't guarantee that people won't be angry. I can't control that.
- I want to be a credible writer, and I want to be able to back myself up with legitimate, reliable sources.
- I will not use The Weekly World News as a legitimate source.
- I am an active member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. That's Mormon, peeps.
- I am liberal.
- I do not like Rush Limbaugh, Ann Coulter, Glenn Beck, or Fox News.
- If you post a link to a John Stewart clip on Facebook, I will probably watch it.
- I have gay family members and friends. I love them, and I support them.
- I might swear a little bit. I promise not to use the f-word. That word actually bothers me a lot.
- Being Mormon, AND liberal, AND working in education, I have friends, family, and acquaintances from very different places with very different beliefs that I may or may not share with them.
- It's okay if you think I am batsh*t crazy and refuse to read anything I write. In fact, if you think what I write might make you mad, just don't read it. I don't want to cause rage in your life.
- I will moderate comments. Please be nice. And write intelligent things. If you call someone names or insult them, I will suggest that you enroll in social skills training and your comment will be deleted. This may not be an issue, as I may end up with a readership consisting of my mom and somebody's cat.
- I like cats.
- I hope you like it. If you do, share it! If you don't, sorry. Well, maybe I'm not sorry.
And now for something completely different:
Thursday, September 4, 2014
Tell them to stop showing their mullets!
There is an unfortunate phenomenon here that Nate has to deal with on a regular basis known as the mullet. He sees them all over the place, but mostly in his classes. Yes, multitudes of teenage boys in Magna and West Valley City have decided that it is a good idea to have a mullet..... and they don't even play hockey. Madelynn overheard him telling me about this the other day and said "You forgot to tell them to stop showing their mullets!" I would suggest that he institute a hats required for all policy, but then he would probably have to deal with confederate flags and playboy insignias. My experience with mullets has mostly been seeing women with them. Is there a genetic pre-disposition with mullets?
While I am on the subject of hair, I noticed something else while taking Madelynn to dance class yesterday- lots of "blondes" with dark roots. I think I was one of the few mom's that hadn't dyed or at least highlighted their hair. I was expecting this, but didn't really encounter it much until yesterday with the dance moms. (Apparently most of the people I work with are either satisfied with their natural hair color or are too poor to do anything about it. We are, after all, working in public education. In Utah.) The size of hair, however, continues to be large. And always has been and probably always will be, though it has improved significantly since the 90s. It is entertaining to look at the photos on the walls of past teacher award recipients from the past few decades at the district office and see the evolution of big hair. There is probably a giant hole in the ozone directly above us from all of the CFCs released from "keeping up with appearances."
I have been hoping that after a month of being here, I would feel more content and welcome. Well, that hasn't really happened. I do frequently give myself reminders of "at least we don't live in_____" After all, there are much worse places that we could be. I still consider Oregon home and have a hard time picturing myself feeling at home and belonging here. I WANT to like it here, because I am stuck here. I have hopes of eventually finding a niche to fit in. I don't see that happening where we currently live, and sometimes want to kick myself for signing a lease until the end of May at a mega-complex unfortunately close to the copper
-spicy vegetable sushi from Harmon's. I have decided to get a sushi mat and start making my own.
-I got to find out early that baby #3 is a boy! And I am completely terrified of having a baby here and being so isolated.
-the east side of the valley. My goal for next spring is to be there and not here.
-hiking. We have taken the kids on 2 hikes since being here, and they were awesome.
-I am loving only working half-time. I don't know if I'll continue to even do that much after baby boy arrives due to daycare being a complete headache here, but it works for now.
-Costco is selling pumpkin pie now.
-I got 5 boxes of Captain Crunch for $1.49 each at Smith's last night. I love Captain Crunch!
And with that, I am going to go make a dinner salad.
-
Sunday, August 10, 2014
Utah, from the perspective of an Oregonian
We made it to Utah on Monday. We were welcomed with rain and thunderstorms, which Nate was totally excited about because he has been craving a good thunderstorm for years. It was a looong and emotional day. I cried when we got to our new apartment because it made everything real and the entire day was a "what the *bleep* are we doing here" moment. Fortunately, my cousin's wife invited me and the kids over for the afternoon while Nate was transferring everything from the ABF trailer to a U-haul truck and made us a yummy dinner. I even managed to get there with the GPS on my phone dropping most of the time. The kids were psychotic monsters the majority of the day, and there was a lots of yelling, crying, and a little swearing, (all of them mostly from me). It was my absolute worst day as a mother, and I felt terrible for how horrible I was being to my children. It didn't help that everytime the GPS actually did work and would tell me where to go, one of the kids would decide to scream, and on the way back, I got horribly lost and ended up at the airport, and Nate's phone died, so I couldn't actually get a hold of him or have any idea where he was. Also, the family dog that my parents got when I was 16 years old had a massive stroke and was put down within hours of us arriving here. Madelynn has been talking all week about how she misses Jack.
So now that the shock of being here is starting to wear off slightly, here are my impressions/observations of our new home:
1. It is not green. Well, considering that we're in the high desert, this is no surprise. But it's a difficult adjustment for me, because I love my trees. This isn't true for every area here; in Salt Lake itself, there are quite a few mature trees. But it's not part of the natural landscape, they were all planted. The further out you get, the more "native" the landscape gets. Compared to Eugene, it's rather desolate here. And we're in West Jordan, close to the Oquirrh mountains, so it is especially desolate out here. Even more so because we are unfortunately close to the Kennecott mine, where they have essentially raped the mountains and it looks like this:
2. The water is terrible. I suspect much of this is because we are rather close to the mine which has undoubtedly contaminated the drinking water. Which apparently doesn't seem to bother a lot of people here, since Daybreak (which was developed by Kennecott) is supposed to the THE place to buy a house. Even though residents have to sign a disclaimer. And I don't care if it's considered "safe" to drink. People are constantly told that their water is safe to drink after fracking. Even though they can light it on fire
3. The Wasatch mountains are breathtaking! It's wonderful to see the big, towering mountains every day. Unfortunately, the area seems to be perpetually in a haze, whether from pollution or if it's on fire like Oregon is every summer, I am not sure, but it's still an amazing view:
4. Gas is cheaper. And you can pump it yourself and don't have to wait forever for someone else to do it for you. Win. Maybe not so much in the winter, but for now, it's a win. Groceries also seem a wee bit cheaper as well, though the quality of produce isn't as great.
5. Dry heat beats humidity. This entire week, it has been absolutely lovely here weather-wise. And yes, that include the random torrential downpours, because it reminds me of home. And on the warm, sunny days we've had, I haven't felt overly hot once. It has yet to get into the triple digits since we've been here, but it has sure made the transition easier. When we were here in June checking things out, it was in the 90s every day, and it still felt tolerable. And we have central air conditioning, as does pretty much every other place here, so when it does get uncomfortable, we can hide in our cool cave. We will probably be spending half the summers in Oregon anyway. So, if you want to come visit us in the next few summers (please do! we should be in a much bigger place by next spring!) plan your trip between mid-July through August. That's when Nate has to be back to coach.
6. Zoning appears to be non-existent. Once upon a time, the many cities in the Salt Lake Valley used to be completely separate entitites with farms and undeveloped land between them all. But urban sprawl has taken over, and the cities all run into each other north to south and east to west. I frequently have no idea which city I am in. And they weren't necessarily planned very well. I saw a few acres of farm right across the street from a massive shopping center. And you might see an apartment complex right next to a tire store. And then a school. Kind of like someone just took a city, threw it all together in a bag and shook it up, then dumped it out. Or a giant took a big crap and said, look, a city! Also, I have yet to be anywhere here besides Salt Lake that has a true downtown. Please tell me where these places are. A strip mall doesn't count.
7. Everything is generic, chain businesses. If you want quality local, you have to go into Salt Lake downtown and around Sugar House, where we did find a yummy Greek place. Now, many of these chain businesses are a good step-up from your typical Wendy's, McDonalds, and Wal-Marts, so this is a plus. I won't complain about having In-N-Out Burger, Culver's, Ikea, Cafe Rio, Five Guys, Famous Dave's and the likes nearby. But it all kind of looks the same. Well, okay, nothing looks like Ikea. And the food itself at these places is yummy, however, it would be nice to have more quirkiness around. You know, like an old victorian house converted into a dessert place with tables dedicated to classical composers, bad service, live pianists and a scuba diver suit in the bathroom. Or an anarchist cafe. (Everytime I take one of those quizzes on facebook, it tells me I belong in Portland. But my checking account doesn't.) The cost of living here is much more pleasing to our bank account.
8. Being close to Temple Square is wonderful! Temple square is like the Mormon version of the Vatican. We took the kids there on Friday, and it was really emotional for me. The last time I was there, I was there with my parents and sibling nearly 10 years ago. Or maybe it was even longer than that. We saw a lot of people coming out from the temple who had just gotten married, and I teared up remembering our own wedding 7 years ago in Portland, where many of our family members were present who have since died. I missed my Dad horribly while walking around, as the last time I was there, he was with me. But it was still beautiful and peaceful. I love that we can go there whenever we feel like it.
9. No place can beat Utah for ice cream. I vaguely remembering my parents commenting once we moved from Utah (Logan), to Iowa City about how the ice cream selection was lacking. Not so here! It's ice cream heaven- entire aisles dedicated to nothing but ice cream and other frozen treats! And it's all relatively cheap. I am planning on keeping a steady supply of Creamies in my freezer at all times. Oh yeah, and you can buy the massive cans of Stephen's hot chocolate here, and in lots of different flavors, because it's made in Farmington! Okay, this is exciting for me, because when I was younger, we used to sell it every year for school fundraisers before you could buy it in the store and we REALLY liked it.
So right now, it's a bit of a mixed bag for us. I REALLY want to fall in love with living here, because moving is a massive headache. The few people we have met so far have all been extremely nice. Nate is working with some really cool people. I have yet to meet anyone I will be working with yet, nor do I know my school assignment, which I will hopefully have sometime this week, because I need to register my kids for school! The kids love our new place, and it is really nice not constantly worrying about whether or not Ian will fall down the wooden stairs. And I kind of like having nice, thick carpet, because you can roll around on the floor much more comfortably. I look forward to discovering more about this area and finding the beautiful places in the many canyons to get my nature fix. And also for my morning sickness to go away.
So now that the shock of being here is starting to wear off slightly, here are my impressions/observations of our new home:
1. It is not green. Well, considering that we're in the high desert, this is no surprise. But it's a difficult adjustment for me, because I love my trees. This isn't true for every area here; in Salt Lake itself, there are quite a few mature trees. But it's not part of the natural landscape, they were all planted. The further out you get, the more "native" the landscape gets. Compared to Eugene, it's rather desolate here. And we're in West Jordan, close to the Oquirrh mountains, so it is especially desolate out here. Even more so because we are unfortunately close to the Kennecott mine, where they have essentially raped the mountains and it looks like this:
2. The water is terrible. I suspect much of this is because we are rather close to the mine which has undoubtedly contaminated the drinking water. Which apparently doesn't seem to bother a lot of people here, since Daybreak (which was developed by Kennecott) is supposed to the THE place to buy a house. Even though residents have to sign a disclaimer. And I don't care if it's considered "safe" to drink. People are constantly told that their water is safe to drink after fracking. Even though they can light it on fire
3. The Wasatch mountains are breathtaking! It's wonderful to see the big, towering mountains every day. Unfortunately, the area seems to be perpetually in a haze, whether from pollution or if it's on fire like Oregon is every summer, I am not sure, but it's still an amazing view:
4. Gas is cheaper. And you can pump it yourself and don't have to wait forever for someone else to do it for you. Win. Maybe not so much in the winter, but for now, it's a win. Groceries also seem a wee bit cheaper as well, though the quality of produce isn't as great.
5. Dry heat beats humidity. This entire week, it has been absolutely lovely here weather-wise. And yes, that include the random torrential downpours, because it reminds me of home. And on the warm, sunny days we've had, I haven't felt overly hot once. It has yet to get into the triple digits since we've been here, but it has sure made the transition easier. When we were here in June checking things out, it was in the 90s every day, and it still felt tolerable. And we have central air conditioning, as does pretty much every other place here, so when it does get uncomfortable, we can hide in our cool cave. We will probably be spending half the summers in Oregon anyway. So, if you want to come visit us in the next few summers (please do! we should be in a much bigger place by next spring!) plan your trip between mid-July through August. That's when Nate has to be back to coach.
6. Zoning appears to be non-existent. Once upon a time, the many cities in the Salt Lake Valley used to be completely separate entitites with farms and undeveloped land between them all. But urban sprawl has taken over, and the cities all run into each other north to south and east to west. I frequently have no idea which city I am in. And they weren't necessarily planned very well. I saw a few acres of farm right across the street from a massive shopping center. And you might see an apartment complex right next to a tire store. And then a school. Kind of like someone just took a city, threw it all together in a bag and shook it up, then dumped it out. Or a giant took a big crap and said, look, a city! Also, I have yet to be anywhere here besides Salt Lake that has a true downtown. Please tell me where these places are. A strip mall doesn't count.
7. Everything is generic, chain businesses. If you want quality local, you have to go into Salt Lake downtown and around Sugar House, where we did find a yummy Greek place. Now, many of these chain businesses are a good step-up from your typical Wendy's, McDonalds, and Wal-Marts, so this is a plus. I won't complain about having In-N-Out Burger, Culver's, Ikea, Cafe Rio, Five Guys, Famous Dave's and the likes nearby. But it all kind of looks the same. Well, okay, nothing looks like Ikea. And the food itself at these places is yummy, however, it would be nice to have more quirkiness around. You know, like an old victorian house converted into a dessert place with tables dedicated to classical composers, bad service, live pianists and a scuba diver suit in the bathroom. Or an anarchist cafe. (Everytime I take one of those quizzes on facebook, it tells me I belong in Portland. But my checking account doesn't.) The cost of living here is much more pleasing to our bank account.
8. Being close to Temple Square is wonderful! Temple square is like the Mormon version of the Vatican. We took the kids there on Friday, and it was really emotional for me. The last time I was there, I was there with my parents and sibling nearly 10 years ago. Or maybe it was even longer than that. We saw a lot of people coming out from the temple who had just gotten married, and I teared up remembering our own wedding 7 years ago in Portland, where many of our family members were present who have since died. I missed my Dad horribly while walking around, as the last time I was there, he was with me. But it was still beautiful and peaceful. I love that we can go there whenever we feel like it.
9. No place can beat Utah for ice cream. I vaguely remembering my parents commenting once we moved from Utah (Logan), to Iowa City about how the ice cream selection was lacking. Not so here! It's ice cream heaven- entire aisles dedicated to nothing but ice cream and other frozen treats! And it's all relatively cheap. I am planning on keeping a steady supply of Creamies in my freezer at all times. Oh yeah, and you can buy the massive cans of Stephen's hot chocolate here, and in lots of different flavors, because it's made in Farmington! Okay, this is exciting for me, because when I was younger, we used to sell it every year for school fundraisers before you could buy it in the store and we REALLY liked it.
So right now, it's a bit of a mixed bag for us. I REALLY want to fall in love with living here, because moving is a massive headache. The few people we have met so far have all been extremely nice. Nate is working with some really cool people. I have yet to meet anyone I will be working with yet, nor do I know my school assignment, which I will hopefully have sometime this week, because I need to register my kids for school! The kids love our new place, and it is really nice not constantly worrying about whether or not Ian will fall down the wooden stairs. And I kind of like having nice, thick carpet, because you can roll around on the floor much more comfortably. I look forward to discovering more about this area and finding the beautiful places in the many canyons to get my nature fix. And also for my morning sickness to go away.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
